Rock, fiction, chivalry… and the phone call. Are these all really dead?
Well, death be damned, because you got a number! This mobile telephonic numerical combination you possess belongs to an attractive, young lady. Whether it was a party, bar, online dating, farmers’ market, book club, hipster coffee joint, wedding, or funeral (Thank you, Will Ferrell), it really does not matter where you met her. All that matters is you have her number.
What are you going to do now? Are you really going to call her? For kitten’s sake, why would you call her?! Why can’t you just text her? It’s so much easier. You can send her a text message filled with wondrous romance like “sup.” If you need a little more class and formality, you can text her “wsup.” See, you have this game down.
So why call when you can text?
You Stand Out as Man Among Boys
Every dude, bro, dude bro, nice guy, awkward guy, douche, smooth operator, player, future husband and current husband (oh what…) engages in SMS texts. So if you’re acting in the same pattern of every male a certain attractive female has ever met, why do you matter to her? How would she perceive your value as a man if you blend in with all the men she has ever met as an adult?
But if you call her, you will instantly be different the instant she sees your incoming call. It can be a complete image overhaul for you all within a second or two, the time it takes for her brain to recognize that a manly man is calling her.
Oh My, What Big Balls You Have
Calling is bold, calling is ballsy. With today’s culture dependent on texting, women –at least the mature ones, the ones who won’t be like ‘Ew, why is he calling me?!’– will appreciate this bold and ballsy act from a man.
But you must not act like what you’re doing is amaze-balls. Even if it is your first time calling her or any female ever for that matter, pretend this is simply what you do. “Standard procedure, ma’am” is your motif. Because if you downplay it, the bold act looks even ballsier.
A Gentleman Calls
With one unique and bold act, you’re showing her that not one but two things are no longer dead: the phone call and chivalry.
Texting without calling is like a chump daydreaming about an easy lottery payout. But calling is like a working man busting his butt on the job. He’s earning it.
That is the essence of a gentleman. You don’t want things handed to you, especially things of value. You want to earn it, you want to work for it, and you want to enjoy the fruits of your labor.
And brother, I promise you, the ladies will take notice of your gentlemanly efforts.
Is she for real?
Does she even want to date? Is she ready, willing and able to do so? What if she’s not? What if you’re not the only one interested in her? What if there are 536 other guys trying to date her? What if tomorrow she has to move to the wrong side of the world?
In a moment of liquid courage, I once obtained a number from a really cute girl at a bar. A couple of days later I called her, only to hear her confess, “Sorry, I’m moving to Korea this weekend.” Despite how ridiculous the situation was, I was relieved I had called. What if instead of calling I had texted her? I presume the new owner of that mobile number would not be pleased at my persistent texts.
Sure, she gave you her number. It’s a good sign, possibly meaning she is attracted to you. But more often than not, it’s not a big deal. Maybe she gave it to you because she felt bad for you. Maybe she gave it to make you go away. Maybe she wants to date, but her life is a mess. Maybe she’s a man.
So instead of spending hours, days and even weeks of texting, simply take ten minutes to call her and learn more about her. You’ll be surprised at how much you can learn about a person just through their phone manners.
Does she take the call? If you leave a voicemail, does she call you back within a day or two? If you get her on the phone, does she sound happy that you called her? Is she shy, distracted or absent-minded or does she engage in the conversation? Is she giving you the benefit of a doubt?
Are You For Real?
When you call a woman, there is absolutely no way to fake the funk. The conversation is in real-time; there is virtually no waiting for a reply, no hiding behind a device or a screen, and no vague responses. A phone call is so real that silence for more than a few seconds can become unbearably awkward.
That is why you must call. You’re looking for a genuine connection with another human person, not just a date or sex. In a way you’re testing yourself. It’s not solely about being real with another person, but more with yourself. Are you serious about dating? Are you really trying? Or are you merely putting in half-assed, half-hearted effort?
Because if you’re not calling, then you’re not for real.
It’s Really Hard to Reject a Guy over the Phone
This is how easy it is for women to reject men through texting:
The blank space above represents nothing. Yup, it takes nothing for a woman to text-reject a man. I’m sure you’re familiar with the following scenario:
James texts: hey u wanna hang out sometime
Mary texts: (no reply)
James: how about dinner this week?
Mary: (no reply)
Mary: (no reply)
James: aw cmon
Mary: (no reply)
But if you can engage a woman over the phone, then it’s almost guaranteed that she will meet you one-on-one. All you have to do is ask.
So, have I convinced you to make the call? Share with me your thoughts or questions with a comment below. Sorry, I don’t take calls.